Valentina Vela Giraldo

residency location | london, uk
AIR March 31- April 6, 2020

coming into

it seems the time is ripe for change

it seems quite clear it is not a resurrection

this thing inside me is a different kind of feast

a different kind of beast

this thing might be a kind of correction

maybe even a type of insurrection

a different sensation

a setting free

I am

growing into my own shape

expanding into a new material

moulding thoughts into the outline of a shell

my silent skin is stretching to embrace me

I can sense it catching up to me

touching, traping, tingling me

I am in formation, transformation, transfiguration

I am turning, twisting, twirling inside my lining

I am ripe for change, in sumation

I am coming

into me

Today
I woke up wanting to be free

I am unfurling, opening, orientating, originating anew
I am cracking tissue open, weeding out the rotten, plotting a way out
I am exhaling a different air, perspiring through my shell, bursting the seams of the cocoon

Today
I woke up waiting to be free

I am occupying places I’d forgotten, taking space
I am storing myself in little pockets, growing roots inside my womb
I am breathing, bleeding, breeding, braiding, brooding, breaking still
I am dreaming of the outside, thinking from the inside, spilling into the exterior of my skin.

I have new dreams lying on my bed, brand new shapes bursting from my head
I have other eyes shaking inside my brain, thicker wind running through my hair

Today
I woke up free

I
am
still
stoic
static
standing
on the ground
walking on the clouds
wading through the air louds
waking to these same old mouths

I am making dust to keep the bugs away
to keep the death at bay

I am breaking my way into this new shape of the same

I am crushing
crashing
cushioning my way into this same mourning
this same pouring this same growing inside my head.

I can’t keep anything inside

cannot speak
cannot say
cannot recall, quote, relay

I feel
the violence of static
status
statistics

the violence of stoic bodies
the violence of staying put
putting things inside of us to stay still

still I
cannot speak

the violence of status
the violence of status
the violence of status
the violence of states

the violence of staying

I want to
speak it out
spill it out
spilling
spelling
s
peeling

I want to
peel my skin off

penicillium digitatum
my oranges are growing mold

even the bacteria is hungry
eating us from inside our own house
eating us from inside our own
bodies
bones
breaths
breathing tubes

i’m not eating fast enough
not ingesting
digesting
divesting enough

i eat on my own

i eat my own
oranges
i eat my own
mold

i eat my own

i grow my own mold
inside

my food is being eaten
I divest

i am di-ves-ted
of vitamins

i am in-ves-ted
in oranges

i am my own
mold

I have been washing my hands more than ever before

Lately

I am now right now thinking about washing my body

All the time

I

Wash myself

Wash my body

Clean my house

Clean my body

Wipe the sweat

Wipe the kitchen counter

I

Feed my body vitamins

Move my body so it stays healthy

I do yoga

I did just meditate

I am eating, drinking, moving, pooping, peeing, washing, farting, cleaning, moisturising

All day

I am

Thinking about what I carry under my nails

Thinking about the hair growing

On my legs

On my head

On my pelvis

In my armpits

On my big toe

Escaping from inside my skin

I don’t leave my house
But my body is in a constant in and out

In and out

Water coming in

Hair growing out

Escaping from the inside of my skin

Valentina is a Colombian mix media performance artist based in London. She is also a teacher, a sometimes banker, a hopeless baker, a gardener, and a migrant. She uses words, images, family footage, and her body to ask questions about belonging, nationalism, and her mother.

︎Valentina’s IG